My husband didn’t buy me flowers – he never has. But that’s because I’ve told him not to – I’m not a bouquet kind of girl.
I didn’t get a heart box of chocolates, because I prefer to go out on the 15th and buy a box at a discounted price.
I didn’t get a mooshy card, which would be my only complaint, but my husband isn’t the kind of guy who buys cards, anyways. He figures it means more if he tells me or shows me what could be conveyed in a card, that he didn’t write. (ergo the card is too impersonal.)
I didn’t get a teddy bear, new jewelry, or breakfast in bed. But, to an Army Wife, what I did receive means so much more than any of that.
I got a phone call, that began with, “Happy Valentine’s Day, Hunny.”
Like I said, SO much better! I got to have a conversation with my husband for almost an hour, and he remembered that it’s Valentine’s Day.
The Holidays are hard for spouses of deployed Service Members – everything we ever got used to doing together, we now have to do alone, and then some, because we want (I would presume) to make the Holidays easier for our spouses who have been taken away from us, and stuck in the Sand Box…to use a metaphor. I’ve touched on this in previous writings during Christmas and the New Year. At least for us, THOSE Holidays are more family-centric. Valentine’s Day is obviously more us-centric, and I’d hope for you also more centered around your relationship as opposed to family.
While Valentine’s Day was never a Holiday we celebrated too seriously, it’s hard NOT to pay any attention at all to a day that’s come to give its meaning to relationships and couples. But things also become more apparent when you’re more vulnerable to reality, when you’re stripped of routine and see the world, in a way, with new sight. All of a sudden, you SEE the couples, you see happiness, love…and you can’t have the same things for now. Not until he (or she) comes home. You have to suffice in yourself, be content with the phone calls, letters, emails, video-chats you receive while you can…and hold on until they come home, and you can fall back into your little Love routine.
That’s how I am doing OK. I got my phone call today, that I’m super excited about receiving. And I have all the things to look forward to for once my husband is home. Life doesn’t stop because our husbands (or wives) are deployed. It just gets re-prioritized until we’re able to resume life as we knew it. Even trees sway in the wind…